Well, it is T-minus 8 days and counting to Unemployment.
My contract at NASA ends at the close of business on February 29, 2012 after 13 years on the same contract. The new contract did not make provisions to hire a trainer, conflict resolution specialist, customer liaison person aka jack of all trades, master of none. Layoff notices have been served - desk is pretty much cleaned out - all that is left is to say goodbye and turn in the rest of my equipment.
Over the last 13 years I have picked up certifications in Lean Six Sigma, a Masters Degree; seen both of my girls graduate from their respective undergrad programs; seen one kid go on to Med School and then Residency - get married and go into private practice.
I've met astronauts and rocket scientists and NASA upper management folks and the workers that make the space program really work and then I discovered that for the most part, they are just like the rest of us. I've made friends, lost a few, seen some move away but the lifelong friends will be with me always.
I've lost family members in that 13 year time and lived out of state for 18 months.
I've learned a lot about myself and how I respond to short, impossible deadlines; how I respond to catastrophic events and that I am strong enough to outlast them all.
And I am very uncertain as to what my future holds. For the first time in my life, I am approaching a major crossroad and neither my Mom or my Dad is here to be my sounding board. I feel like a sailboat with no centerboard - able to move but drifting with the tide.
So, I will dry my tears, put a smile on my face, hold my head up high and keep moving forward to whatever window or door is opening for me. I hope I don't miss it; I think that is the most frightening part of all of this venture. I hope and pray I recognize the open window or door when it appears.
On March 1st, I will sleep in, have my coffee and a long walk with my Maggie dog then apply for unemployment.
On March 2nd, I will get my hair trimmed and my nails and toes done.
And on March 3rd, I will get on the Triumph and sail to Progresso and Cozumel and enjoy the warm sun and clear blue water of the Gulf of Mexico. To paraphrase Scarlett O'Hara, I'll think about the rest of it when I get back from my cruise!!!
I hope to have some wonderful stories to share when I return and maybe find that centerboard for my sailboat!!
I am very familiar with this experience you are having. I can tell you that it will be okay, no matter what the next door or window brings. It may take a while, but you'll come through it and be better when it's done.
ReplyDeleteEnjoy your trip. Wishing you smooth sailing, literally and figuratively.
As soon as I saw the picture, I knew what your blog post was about. I think I was blessed with an inner Scarlet O'Hara who has the ability to say "I'll think about that tomorrow."
ReplyDeleteNot long ago I found a scripture that makes me think Scarlet might have had the right idea.
"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble." Matthew 6:34 Interestingly enough it immediately follows the verse "But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you." Matthew 6:33